This is the eighth in a series this year we’re covering in my weekly Y12SR session (Tuesdays 7 pm ET). Each month, I explore one of the 12 Steps through my own experience as a Yoga practitioner. What I’ve noticed over the years is that even if we may not identify as a person in recovery from addiction (of any kind: substance, process, behavior) it is a useful framework for looking at any behavior from which we seek freedom.
“Made a list of all persons we had harmed, and became willing to make amends to them all.”
In my experience, here is the essence of Step 8:
In my human-ness, and especially in the depths of my active addiction, I know I’ve caused harm. I’ve been selfish, or reckless, or cynical, or controlling, or I’ve withheld my love and kindness when I knew better. Operating from my craving mind, my relationships have suffered. My attachment to control and comfort have led to harmful outcomes. I hold those people I’ve harmed with my behavior in my mind and heart, and I imagine making things better.
My intent is to become ready to make amends wherever my actions have caused harm- through conflict, ill will, or negligence.
My intent today is to change my relationships.
My intent is to further clarify what is- and is not- mine to carry.
My intent is to become open, kind, and loving.
My intent is to find and practice generosity of spirit, appreciation, and kinship toward those even with whom there is pain.
May I move from selfish grasping to clarity and a lightness of heart.
May I find the courage inside my lightened heart to make things right.
May I open my voice, laying down the names of those my actions have affected, to an offering of kindness.
May I find the willingness to change as the fire of courage begins to burn inside me.
May I be the one with the strength and fortitude to do the right thing.
May I be open to receiving guidance toward whatever actions will heal, resolve, and repair the wounds of the past and present.
May my commitment to this path remain strong and steady, despite whatever uncertainty, fear and shame may arise in me as I reflect on my past mistakes and imagine the future.
May I emerge from this challenging time freer, clearer, and with greater self knowledge and self trust than ever before.
